"hi,
kemon aacho?asha kori bhalo.tumi aamake kemon
bhalobasho bujhte perechi.u re not at all serious abt
me,nahole aamar ekta khobor na niye etodin thakte
parte na."
I stopped on this mail for a moment while clearing out the junk folder today. The sender was none other than the person who once doubted my integrity and severed all ties. Funny that she could mail again and try and rekindle a flame which does not even have a wick to burn on. But it was a moment of triumph... or was it triumph no, but a bit more subtle... a feeling of a spent hope with some splash of nostalgia and bit of feel-good. It was like being acquitted of being blamed of something horrible... Like the feeling that comes to someone who reads the daily newspapers and gets a feeling of "I am not that bad after all....with events like these happening all round I am pretty well off."
I felt a sudden urge to call up that person and plead for this to be over... for good or for bad... but, then again I pause, let her hang in an uncertainty... There is a satisfaction of not replying at all...."Boobar shotru nei..."
Addendum:
---------
Mailing has now picked up some regularity and things dont seem all that messed up now... But I guess it all boils down to the same old poem 'The road not taken' where it says:
TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
I did really take the road less travelled by and have initiated a friendly banter which I have not regretted till date... I am not looking to renew the trust that was broken but I am merely giving a space for the other person to breathe. It is not affecting me or taking my time but it is for the greater good and for making one less discontent person... so why not?
